Life cycle

Every lesson in life starts this way, always.

'I am 15 now. I’m big enough to know what I should be doing and what I shouldn’t.'

‘See dear, you’re growing but not grown up yet, you still have so much more to see in life.’

‘What does the rest of my life or experience got to do with all of this?’

‘We’re not telling you so only about this issue but every other you’ll be facing as you grow up.’

‘You always say that! You enjoy saying ‘no’ to me right? You elders are all the same, you never understand me. You’re all old-fashioned. You have no clue how I think or what I want or need.’

‘Do you really think that we don’t know?’

‘Of course, otherwise you wouldn’t refuse me now.’

‘OK, how is it possible that you’ve become 15 without us providing anything for you at all? You think that we don’t know what you want? Then how is it that you always got everything you wanted without asking?’

‘Grrr…enough of this lecture, every time I want something, you give me this lecture.’

‘If you want to discuss this like an adult and not like a kid, it would do better to sit and talk rather than walk off.’

‘Fine. Tell me!’

‘Why do you think that till date you’ve been getting everything you wanted?’

‘Well, that’s simple. I’m your only son, if you wouldn’t give me, to who else would you. Besides you love me.’

‘Good enough. We’re also your only set of parents, right? In that case you should also be listening and obeying us all the time right? But how come we don’t see you doing that often. You choose to get whatever you want from us. But what about what we want from you? And we believe that you love us too. I asked you to join us this evening for the puja, did you?’

‘No’

‘Why not? You see my dear, it’s not about love or being the only child, the magic word here is respect. How much do you respect our wishes? Every time we said ‘yes’ to you or asked what you would want to do, it was only because we respected your decision to do so. But you failed to see that. You failed to realise that everything is based on respect. They say that respect is a give-take relationship. Give us respect my son, and you shall have whatever you want. And mind you, respect doesn’t only mean addressing us with respect but also obeying us and listening to us. You understand, don’t you?’

‘Oh whatever, fine I’ll do what you want, can I go now?’

‘Sigh. When will he learn?’

This episode replayed in my mind, just now my 10 year old daughter walked out of the room because I refused to let her go for a movie today.

Some lessons are learnt by experience only.

What goes around comes around. So are the laws of life.