The Story till now :-Rishav and Shree - Part 3

As the day dawned, Sheeru began to get ready for the “meeting” as she liked to call it in her head; afraid to call it a date, for the fear of disappointment. Rishav, on the other hand was battling jet lag. His soft plush bed at the hotel was calling to him. An urge difficult to resist after the arduous journey, but one that he had to. Sheeru had chosen the café. A quiet place in the plush corner of the city, decorated with paintings by upcoming artists from across the city. A place that was just enough public, enough private.

Sheeru discarded 15 outfits before finally settling on the Rani pink saree. She knew that she looked great in sarees. This one, especially, was becoming to her very much, complementing her dusky complexion. He would like this very much. Rishav, stood in front of the full length mirror in the bath, holding a shirt in each hand. Blue or Brown; Brown or Blue. What would she like? He picked the blue one. She couldn’t get herself to eat even a bite before heading out. Her stomach was full of butterflies. She would throw up if she even thought of food right now. The only thing she could think of right now, was if Rishav would like her.  The drive was 30 minutes from where she lived. Thirty long onerous testy minutes in the city traffic. He was having a tough time keeping still. What if Shree wouldn’t like him? He wanted to push that possibility out of his head, but couldn’t think of anything else. He had to wait ten minutes for the cab to arrive, and thirty more to get to the café she’d picked. Had to be the most anxious forty minutes of his life. He had to remind himself to breathe.

As He got into the cab, he received a text. “I’m almost there.” Damn. His data had just run out. He couldn’t reply. He was now going to make her wait. Damn it! Way to go, first impression. She worried as the blue ticks appeared, but a reply didn’t follow. Was this guy going to stand her up after all they had spoken about? Perhaps not. She would wait some more to find out. She kept fidgeting with the end of her saree, glancing repeatedly at the entrance to the café. What if he showed up, and a look of disappointment flashed across his face? She didn’t know what she would do then. He spoke to Rashid the cab driver, to keep himself from tearing his nails out. He was more nervous today than he had been on his first job interview. He visualized happiness and unhappiness in alternation, reflect across her beautiful face. He couldn’t deal with the latter. Everything would be in vain.

She memorized the menu as she waited. She ordered a Latte for the want of something to do. As she looked up from the menu, He walked in, across the pebbled path, into the café; not taking his eyes off hers, locking her in his gaze. And that’s when Rishav and Shree knew. This was it. This was fated. This was something. This was great and more. This was other-worldly. This was Love.

As the moment dawned,

Dawn it did upon my being,

This was to be cherished. For safe-keeping,

Locked forever, key lost to the world.

The fleeting thumping,

The soaring highs,

The laughter ringing in my eyes.

Laugh I did, in yester-years,

Falling in love? In a moment?

Hah! A thing for the movies,

And myriad dramas, only for novels.

Today withal, I saw the light.

Love knew no reasons,

Love knew no checklists,

Love knew no boundaries,

Love knew no symmetry.

Love is to love, just to love.

And fall, I did as hard as they fell.

The Story till now - Shree :- Part 2

SHREE

I don’t get even a wink of sleep before the night of the travel. I lie awake with all sorts of morbid thoughts running through my mind about how awfully wrong my journey could go. This not only goes on when I travel, but also when my loved ones do. This was one of those nights. I couldn’t stop thinking of all the different ways in which we wouldn’t meet each other’s expectations. Perhaps it would be hate at first sight. I had been obsessing over this ever since he had confirmed his trip to seal the deal.  My mind kept racing back to the first time my father had shared his profile with me.

“I’m sick of all these NRI engineers Papa! They’re all the same. Not an ounce of grey matter and boring as hell.”

“Come now Sheeru. Just speak to him once. If you don’t like how he sounds, we’ll politely decline their alliance. Ek try toh banta hai beta.”

And that is how it all began. I reasoned that I had nothing to lose by speaking to the guy once. What could one harmless conversation do? I found out the very next day; I was floored the first time I spoke to him. There was something the way he spoke. It seemed so easy to let go and say whatever was really on my mind. If you knew me, you’d understand how difficult it was for me to open up to new people. I mostly feel like I am speaking in a language different from the one that people around me understand. It felt great to have someone who finally got me! Somehow, he didn’t feel new. He felt vaguely familiar, and I took to him quite easily. I sometimes felt like he could even read my mind. I connected to him at a level that I hadn’t with anyone else before. It felt perfect, may be too perfect.

However, I had a very ominous feeling about this whole affair. It seemed too good to last. I was hoping against hope over here, for this to pan out. The last couple of years were easily my toughest ones. I had tasted failure with everything that I had touched. I wasn’t unhappy with my life, don’t misunderstand me. I was every grateful for everything that had been bestowed upon me; I just felt like I wasn’t ever enough for it all. And somehow, this incredibly familiar stranger had made me feel enough and more. He brought out emotions in me that I had kept locked up for years now. The ease that I felt around him had made me even confess my deepest darkest desires to him. He made me happier than I had ever been, and this was even before I’d laid my eyes upon him.

“Don’t worry Sheeru. It’ll all go well beta. Just have faith.”

“I know Papa. It’s just that everything seems so perfect. I feel like this is it. This either makes it or breaks it. I cannot even picture the emotional consequences for me if this doesn’t work out. And that scares me.”

“Sheeru. Calm down. Don’t think that just because the past has been tough on you, things will continue to be that way. Things, situations and times are constantly changing. Every day is not going to be a bad one for you. Trust your gut beta. Trust your heart. They will never lie to you about how you feel about someone. Take my advice: stop fretting about the decision, just look forward to enjoying the time you have with him. Some people come into our lives to stay, others just come in to bring us happiness, and leave. Don’t worry about which one of the two he is. Just go with the flow, and trust me your heart with take the decision for you.”

I jolted back to the now, as the hot water turned tepid. The day to take the call was here. Today would be our first date. Would it be the first of many? Would our online chemistry take fire in reality? I’d soon find out.

Arranged marriage ?

Arranged marriages. In India arranged marriages are so common, in fact 90% of marriages in India are still arranged. To an outsider, this might seem nothing short of scary!

To some people arranged marriage is a big no-no, while some consider it to be the last resort. Not able to find someone you like, or not able to make it worth with the people you do like, there you go, the arranged marriage is for you. This is not always the case. In my opinion, it is something new, something fresh, and change in life. Isn't it better to slowly eventually fall in love with the man you have married ? I'd like that, much more romantic anyday.

This video just puts my thoughts in action. Made by Nars Krishnamachari. A beautiful video.

Though this video does not actually represent the outcome or the process that every arranged marriage follows. It's a good one, and leaves you smiling to your self. 

Dreams in Prussian Blue- A Review

It is breezy, light, and meaningful. It is an excellent read, and an absolute page turner.

I am talking about Paritosh Uttam's maiden novel 'Dreams in Prussian Blue'.

Naina is the protagonist of the book. The book revolves around the lives of Naina, and her live-in boyfriend, and college art genius Michael Agnello.

Naina and Michael are both students at the Fine Arts college in Mumbai. Head over heels in love with Michael, Naina drops out of college with him, leaving behind her family and way of life. It is only after a while that she realises that life is not at all a bed of roses. All Michael is interested in doing is painting through the night. He refuses to share any of the other responsibilities at home, cranky and irresponsible most of the time. Naina struggles with many odd jobs, providing everything for Michael, including his painting supplies. Naina also works hard to get Michael some kind of recognition as a painting genius. The lack of Michael's cooperation on anything leads to failure in every aspect. Just when Naina's patience wears thin, and she is all set to leave Michael, tragedy intervenes. Michael loses his eyesight in an accident, and Naina is back to where she began in the first place. As she struggles to make both ends meet, and Michael happy, she has transcended to becoming a liar, and a cheat.

Will Michael ever forgive her for what she has done to him? Will she be able to forgive Michael, for pushing her to such ends? Or will there be two separate personal tragedies?

The novel is fast paced, and breezy. It delivers just what it promises to be, a Metro read. It goes to show the various nuances in the lives of live-in couples. It shows the consequences of rushing into any relationship without rational thought. It efficiently displays the sorrow, and despair prevailing in such life. It showcases the fact that a person with a passion, like art cannot be capable of adjusting in any other occupation. Blue seems to be the central theme of the book, as it is evident in the title. Whether it is Naina who is blue with sorrow, or Michael who in his blindness, cannot see anything else.

Almost throughout the book, the reader is sympathetic towards Naina. Naina has put all her dreams on hold for Michael's sake, who is insensitive to her needs, feelings or dreams. It is commendable that a male writer has been able to empathise so well, with what a woman goes through in such situations. What one must remember is that Michael is also a victim here, but merely of the circumstances. His views on life and materialism, though indifferent, ring the bell of truth.

The narrative technique is good. The time frame constantly shifts from the present to the past and back. It is something fresh, but definitely not something that is unheard of. It is character central. The characters have been dealt with very well.

It is fast paced, and leaves you dwelling upon the realities of life, as we know it. A good read.

Cheated on..

It hurt to even think about it.

I wondered, how long would it take me to get over this? Would I always find myself in tears thinking about it? Or worse, would I just stubbornly shut it all up in one corner of my brain, and never visit it again? Would I be able to do that? Or would I erupt with emotions like a volcano, unable to bottle up too much?

Nobody had ever told me it would feel like this. Nobody had prepared me for this one. Nobody ever even thought that it would happen to me. Anybody but me. We were easily the most ideal couple known to friends. Probably, that’s the reason we didn’t last. Ideal relationships don’t exist.

Our love story had been something right out of a Hindi movie, very dramatic. I had first laid my eyes on him during a dance workshop in my college. I was in the first year of college then, and he was in his final year. You could call it love at first sight. He looked like a Greek God to me. Those beautiful hazel eyes, the straight aristocratic nose, and the dimpled smile. He had completely swept me off my feet. The next day, he asked me out on a date. We hit off instantly. Every waking moment was in his company. After I graduated, he approached my parents. Things didn’t go down too well with them, we were of different castes. After a year, I did manage to convince my parents, but they’d made it plain that they’d have nothing to do with me after the wedding. I was dead to them.

Looking back at the way I thought we loved each other, and how much in love we were. It had been very difficult for me to believe that he had done this to me.

Somebody should gift me a self-help guide, which would probably go along the lines of "Rulebook for dumped, cheated-on wives."

For the first one month, my brain was filled with only one question. "Why?"
I was young, beautiful, intelligent, qualified, and sexy. I had been married to Amar, just over three years, when I found out about his extra curricular activities.

I had happened to come home early one winter afternoon, and found her in my silk robe, on his lap.

I was enraged, broken and felt betrayed. I could almost taste the hate and anger running through my body in my veins. I immediately filed for divorce, and he was more than happy to let go of me.

I always had very strong beliefs about adultery and the breach of trust in a marriage. For me, it was the worst thing a person could do to another. Nothing was worse than lying to a person who trusted and loved you the most. It was worse than murder. Murder just crumples the body; treachery crumples a person’s heart, rendering them unable to feel anything. Total numbness prevails.

Her name was Anita. At first, they were just colleagues at office. Later, "good friends". There were even times when we three would hang out together. Now thinking about it made me feel like, at all those get-togethers, Amar and Anita were always just silently laughing at how foolish I was. Unable to see, what they were doing to my life. They must’ve found it very amusing; I was tying the noose around my own neck without even knowing about it.
　
It’s been a year now, since I found out. I still find it difficult to think about it. It hurts. I know that my heart is somewhat mended, taped up to hold it together, but you can still see the cracks in it.

I doubt if I will fall in love ever again. I doubt if I will ever trust again.

But I also had beliefs about the way God functioned. When he closed a door in your face, he also opened a window to your back.